How Is Estate Planning Like Crafting the Perfect Lasagna?
Ever heard those horror stories of families torn apart over Grandma's jewelry or trapped in endless legal battles after a loved one passes? Or how selling a house can take forever because it’s stuck in probate? Worse yet, some family members can be completely denied their inheritance. Sadly, these scenarios happen all the time—even to the rich and famous. A quick Google search will reveal countless celebrity cases filled with posthumous drama.
What most people don’t realize is that these outcomes are entirely avoidable—if you know the right steps. So, if you’ve been thinking about creating a will or trust to protect your loved ones, let’s first take a closer look at what’s really at stake. And fair warning—we’re about to dive into a food analogy, so you might get a little hungry as you read on!
Lasagna as a Metaphor: Understanding the Difference Between a Will, a Trust, and an Estate Plan
Let’s start by getting crystal clear on what we’re talking about. You’ve likely heard the term “estate planning” thrown around, but do you really understand what it entails? Contrary to popular belief, estate planning isn’t just about having a will or trust in place.
Think about your favorite recipe. Let’s take lasagna as an example. A good lasagna requires several key components: the ingredients, their specific quantities, and the step-by-step process to turn those ingredients into the final dish. Without following the recipe, all you have are raw ingredients—they don’t magically turn into lasagna on their own.
Estate planning works the same way. Your estate plan is like the recipe, while the documents—such as a will or trust—are just the ingredients. A will might be the pasta, and a trust could be the sauce, but without the rest of the ingredients and the right steps, all you’ve got is pasta and sauce—not the finished lasagna. Similarly, creating just a will or trust means you have documents, but those documents won’t achieve your goals by themselves.
It’s a common misconception that having the documents equals having an estate plan. This misunderstanding stems from a lack of information. Too often, the focus is solely on the documents, even by many lawyers and so-called financial “experts,” who assume that signing a will or trust is the only step needed. Some DIY programs, like LegalZoom, perpetuate this idea, and now even AI is jumping in.
What they’re all missing is the big picture: they’re giving you some of the ingredients, but not the full recipe. Without the recipe, you end up with the messes we’ve all heard about—families tangled in legal battles, fights over sentimental items, lengthy waits to settle estates, and even hefty, unnecessary tax bills.
If you truly want to protect your loved ones and ensure your wishes are carried out smoothly, you need a comprehensive estate plan. A plan that doesn’t just give you the ingredients but tells you exactly how to put them together to create something meaningful and effective.
And if you don’t create your own comprehensive plan, don’t worry—your state already has one in place for you. Unfortunately, it probably looks nothing like what you want.
Your State’s Version of Lasagna Might Leave a Bad Taste
To help explain the difference between your State’s default estate plan and the one you can create for yourself, let’s go back to our lasagna analogy.
Imagine the State’s lasagna recipe includes spicy sausage, but you can’t handle spicy foods. Or maybe it has meat, but you’re a vegetarian. Worse yet, perhaps it calls for mushrooms, and your child is allergic. Some key ingredients might be missing, and the recipe could even tell you that you can’t bake the lasagna for months or years (your family would be starving!). In short, the State’s plan might include things that don’t work for you—or worse, things that could harm your family.
In reality, the State’s plan determines how your assets will be distributed, who receives them, and in what amounts. It typically involves a lengthy, expensive court process where assets can even be frozen until the proceedings are done. On top of that, it’s designed in a way that invites conflict—your family members, even those you may be estranged from, are notified about the court process and can make claims on your assets. This could create a situation you wouldn’t want.
But here’s the good news: the law gives you the power to create your own plan. By doing so, you can choose exactly who inherits your assets and how. You can even include donations to charities that are important to you, which the State’s plan doesn’t allow. And best of all, you can decide whether your loved ones will have to go through the court process—because yes, it can be avoided altogether with the right plan in place.
Which Recipe Will You Choose for Your Estate?
By creating your own estate plan, you get to design your lasagna recipe just the way you want it. You can choose whether it’s meat or veggie, mild or spicy sausage. You can exclude any ingredients your family might be allergic to. You even decide whether to share your lasagna with others. Plus, you’re in control of when it’s served—whether it’s enjoyed right away or prepped, frozen, and saved for later.
Maybe the State’s recipe isn’t all that bad, and you wouldn’t change a thing. But you won’t know until you fully understand the details of the State’s plan and how it applies to you, your assets, and your loved ones. Or, you might find the State’s recipe completely unappetizing and want to create something your family actually enjoys. Either way, knowing exactly what you want to create and how to do it correctly is essential—and we’re here to help you make that happen.
How We Guide You to the Perfect Plan
We’ve witnessed too many families go through unnecessary hardship after losing a loved one. Even if you haven’t experienced it yet, the odds are that you will at some point. But with the right knowledge—starting with debunking the myth that estate planning is just about documents—we can help break the cycle of confusion and conflict.
As a Personal Family LawyerⓇ Firm, we prioritize educating you on the State’s plan for your assets and, more importantly, how to create your own plan that reflects your values, goals, and family’s needs. We call this Planning Session. Once your Planing Session is in place, you’ll have peace of mind knowing your wishes will be honored, your loved ones will be cared for, and your property will be safeguarded.
Book a call with us today to get started.
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This article is a service of 20WestLegal LLC. We don't just draft documents; we ensure you make informed and empowered decisions about life and death for yourself and the people you love. That's why we offer a Planning Session, during which you will get more financially organized than you've ever been before and make all the best choices for the people you love. You can begin by calling our office today to schedule an Initial Planning Session and mention this article to find out how to get this $750 session at no charge.
The content is sourced from Personal Family Lawyer® for use by Personal Family Lawyer® firms, a source believed to be providing accurate information. This material was created for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as ERISA, tax, legal, or investment advice. If you are seeking legal advice specific to your needs, such advice services must be obtained on your own separate from this educational material.